Love Without Agenda » Culture

Our Thrifty Fun

Lisa O'Brien-Wentzel — Fri, 28 May 2010 21:25:20 +0000

We at LWA have been in “moving mode” for a month or so now.

oh there’s a lot that we want to write about on our “moving from the suburbs to the city experience”:
change-growth-home-challenge-creativity-people-diversity-needs-letting go-working hard…….

but for today I just wanted to share some of our “thrifty fun” ideas.

Whether rich or poor, we are committed to using monies wisely, trying to recycle, repurpose, DIY, work hard with our own hands and live on less. This takes us a wonderful world of creative and collaborative people, which is super inspiring. For me it feels “healthy” and somehow “right”. I even discover more creativity inside of my own self when in this space.

In the past month we have:

-taken our old poker table..and made it into Spencer’s desk, using only a saw, screwdriver, strong arms and our secret tool: industrial velcro !

-took an old piece of barnwood that we found and made it into a table with: sandpaper, wipe on Read more...

It’s Just a Ride

Brad Siefert — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 21:04:25 +0000

Almost every comedian that you or I have ever seen on TV or heard in a comedy club lists Bill Hicks as one of the most influential comedians ever. Bill sadly died of cancer in 1994, but is still widely known as a special funnyman and human being in general. Bill Hick’s signature bit was called, “It’s Just a Ride” where he talks about life and seeing people and the world with either fear or love. It’s a poignant, almost non-comedic end to his 1993 HBO Special “Revelations.”

Becoming a Heretic (Thanks to Seth Godin)

Brad Siefert — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 20:44:08 +0000

If anyone out there still hasn’t at least skimmed Seth Godin’s landmark book “Tribes” please run out and do so immediately. Seth Godin has become one of the leading people in the world at seeing how the present is shaping the future—and in his book Tribes, he talks about how small, medium or even gigantic Tribes, are shaping the future. Apple fanboys are a tribe, tv.WineLibrary.com is a tribe, TED is a tribe, the Church is a tribe, shoot even Al Qaeda is a tribe. Tribes happen because “people” (read leaders) see something that can be better, something that is incomplete or something that your passionate about and those leaders (plus a small cadre of friends and like-minded cohorts) laud, sweat, work for, beg, borrow, and or steal to make that change or progress happen.

One prerequisite for being a leader of a tribe seems to be being a heretic on at least one level or another. Now I know that the overwhelming majority of people that just read the word heretic, their minds just ran to their favorite Church leader they like to bash or someone who’s theology Read more...

Learning To Love With Jessie (Part 2)

Lisa O'Brien-Wentzel — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 19:53:28 +0000

Lucky for me i make my decisions based on my dreamer parts and get there using my engineer parts. First why, then how. Otherwise we lock dreams in reality and only read about them as stories.

When we adults opt out of important moments in the lives of kids, we rob them, their kids, and ourselves; we are fools to think anything is unseen.

So, the fun began with Jessie in our home.
My oldest son shared his solo bedroom. He no longer sat in the front seat of the car, Jessie did. He had someone older to watch older kid movies with. Sometimes they shared friends and play sports at a more mature level. He moved his role in the family as first born, to some extent. I dont think it was so easy for him. He listened to a LOT more talking than his brothers did. He listened to talking about bad hair days and feeling fat days. He helped her with math. She tells him he is smart, she is very expressive. He learns how to empathize and relate with well chosen words.

I observe kids “loving without agenda” better than adults. These kids did not chose their Read more...

No. Your daughter cannot play with my son…

Jimmy Spencer Jr. — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 22:24:30 +0000

My friend Brad, who works here in the LWA offices, told me a saying that goes “1/3 of all things our parents believed when they were growing up…we will eventually find very silly”

Put this in that category.

Today marked the passing of the judge, Sylvia Pressler, who forced Little League to allow girls the opportunity to play baseball with boys. Apparently in 1973, little girls were not seen fit to play baseball, with or without little boys.

I’m reminded that this seemingly common sense thing—that we assume has always been—had to be fought hard for…and it (like all changes) was seen as both radical and deeply subversive at the time. I love the quote from the Little League on the court’s ruling (yes…Little league fought this tooth and nail…even appealing the ruling)

The ruling was decried by Little League as “conceived in vindictive and prejudicial fashion of the worst kind”

Amazing.

The story really puts change in perfect perspective. Change is never easy—even for something Read more...

Learning To Love With Jessie (Part 1)

Lisa O'Brien-Wentzel — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 21:31:51 +0000

Quite often i see life as a sport where love is the action, every moment like a ball thrown our way for us to practice the art of loving without agenda.

Jessie is in my life one of those wonderful moments, lived on.

I was total “koolaid mom”, lived on a block in suburbia in a 1920′s bungalow with charm all its own, its wooden red door always open for the neighborhood kids to become family with my 3 boys. We had tons of fun: made those tents from blankets and chairs on rainy days, ran around outside with sticks on all days, played baseball in the neighbors yard on nicer days and made stuff from playdough on special days. I made lots and lots of plates of grilled cheese sandwiches and swept lots and lots of crumbs.

Jessie is the only girl on the block, a couple years older than the crowd of elementary school boys; mostly happy that her super high energy and, in her teen girl mind, menacing little brother, was always at my place. She lived at first with both parents, then mom, then grandma, then dad. Troubles in her home the same as many folks Read more...

being perfect

Lisa O'Brien-Wentzel — Sat, 26 Dec 2009 04:32:52 +0000

we at LWA had a “photo shoot” thing the other day. first time for me. Brad, who does our photo and design and his team worked hard, did great.

the whole picture thing is not natural for me, im not a limelight person. but i write because i think i tapped into something deeper about me yesterday at “the photo shoot”

i not only fail to be one of those “picture perfect women”, i dont think i really want to be? its not a fear. its a choice…………..

it was all about my hair…

i got the call to come take photos. i had just gotten my hair colored and had new aveda smoother products. AH! perfect!, i thought. i can be a perfect hair woman. i did the hair and makeup. all perfect like, highlights, shine, volume etc. and it felt….perfect.

not me.

i live in chicago, and it was a cold and windy out (perfect hair ruin weather), so i walked to my photo shoot and did Read more...

A Letter from Jesus about Christmas

Jimmy Spencer Jr. — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 20:50:14 +0000

I’m a practicing Christian…although Love Without Agenda isn’s faith based– I do recognize the powerful foundation faith can provide for loving others—this is a note my friend Andrew Wood posted and I really like it’s sentiment…and since I’m a Christian & it so captures LWA’s spirit — I think its appropriate for me to share this here– Love you all….Spencer

A ‘Letter’ from Jesus about Christmas

It has come to my attention that many of you are upset that folks are taking My name out of the season.

How I personally feel about this celebration can probably be most easily understood by those of you who have been blessed with children of your own. I don’t care what you call the day. If you want to celebrate My birth, just GET ALONG AND LOVE ONE ANOTHER.

Now, having said that let Me go on. If it bothers you that the town in which you live doesn’t allow a scene depicting My birth, then just get rid of a couple of Santas and snowmen and put Read more...

Why We’re Giving Away Our Book

Jimmy Spencer Jr. — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 04:55:39 +0000

I posted this question “Ask us why we are giving our book away for free”

I went and took an hour or so nap—— and came back to 10 people who wanted an answer.

So here you go.

Our book is about you. It’s about the meaning of life— it’s about us loving ourselves and other people. It also about how to actually be that type person from the inside out– and finally its about— all the things that stop us from living and thinking like that.

Its my take on what practicing christianity is supposed to be: love without agenda

anyways…

The main force on this planet eroding our ability to see people as valuable is this mindset of being a perpetual customer— that no matter where we go or what we do—— the world (and the people in it) are simply here for our use…and we just fail to see people as valuable.

people become fuel for our desires
people become fuel for my success
Read more...

Because He’s a Boy

Lisa O'Brien-Wentzel — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 04:31:18 +0000

last cold and snowy sunday in chicago as the boys were carrying in the food from tim’s trunk, we adults who were cooking, look out the window to gaze upon this lovely family ritual, and see the youngest boy throwing dinner rolls into the snow.
“why is he throwing dinner rolls at the snow?!”, one of the guys said.
” because he’s a boy i said” as i giggled inside with the joy for i now i see such illogical behavior as logical.

Today my oldest of 3 sons turns 18. and i think back to all of the things that boys just do. because, they are boys. i guess. although of course, as we train our boys not to just throw food in the snow, i find a crazy beauty of manhood in such behaviors. and i know that without some of these male desires, the world would not have bridges or spaceships and airplanes, or meat.

life is choked by control. it is fed by guidance and nurture. i wonder if we sometimes choke men and actually just squeeze the life so that if it cant do what it was made to do, it then does what it was not made to do, for Read more...