Love Without Agenda » parenting

Because He’s a Boy

Lisa O'Brien-Wentzel — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 04:31:18 +0000

last cold and snowy sunday in chicago as the boys were carrying in the food from tim’s trunk, we adults who were cooking, look out the window to gaze upon this lovely family ritual, and see the youngest boy throwing dinner rolls into the snow.
“why is he throwing dinner rolls at the snow?!”, one of the guys said.
” because he’s a boy i said” as i giggled inside with the joy for i now i see such illogical behavior as logical.

Today my oldest of 3 sons turns 18. and i think back to all of the things that boys just do. because, they are boys. i guess. although of course, as we train our boys not to just throw food in the snow, i find a crazy beauty of manhood in such behaviors. and i know that without some of these male desires, the world would not have bridges or spaceships and airplanes, or meat.

life is choked by control. it is fed by guidance and nurture. i wonder if we sometimes choke men and actually just squeeze the life so that if it cant do what it was made to do, it then does what it was not made to do, for Read more...

Did I help you pack for Sunday?

Lisa O'Brien-Wentzel — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 03:43:52 +0000

first i packed a hospital bag; ready for that day i would touch you.
then i packed your diaper bag; ready for anything a day would bring.
even placed in there things to help you grow; toys and books that sing.
then i packed your lunch bag with preschool treats and little notes to get you through the change.
later i packed your backpack, making sure you’d be okay while away for an entire day. quarters for emergencies that need a cookie or some milk.
then we packed your sports gear, so that you wont get hurt. everything as the coach said, not less, not more.
we packed for vacations: some five star hotels, some tents in the woods.
i showed you to pack for the “unforseen” happenings, useful items like duct tape and safety pins, hold things together in a pinch. jumper cables in the car and emergency phone numbers in your cell.

we learned to pack our insides, too. our emotions and character needed to grow ready too.
we learned to pack for a big big life, where we have a part to give to. we learned that its far more Read more...

the weather on mothers day

Lisa O'Brien-Wentzel — Sun, 11 May 2008 05:17:07 +0000

dear lord
i speak to you now with a heart filled with so much
heaviness. a cloud filled day.
i long to persevere…. and am tired
i feel unequipped. i am not great. all this is new to me.
i do long to capture each teachable moment of the lives of my children
to send them into this world grounded in the knowledge of you,
with strength of fine man and gentleness to care!
-i feel overwhelmed by all my jobs
they are too much:
to provide. to be there whenever they need me. to teach and train. to keep our house, manage our home.
to be the one that they can count on to take us through life storms

to be the one who can answer the questions of their souls:
what makes a man a man? do they really pray?
how do i manage stress?.. is there a way beyond simply hiding or shifting from it?
what is happiness?.. must i always be? what do i need to stay there? can it be exist within my own self?
is courage fearlessness?.. or the ability to walk over my fear?
what is failure? …..what does Read more...